What hurdles are we up against that make having a simpler life difficult? In my years of pursuing LIFE ON PURPOSE, and in my experience life coaching women, I know that there can be a lot of “WHY NOTs” that pop up for us. They tell us a lot about our own limiting mindsets and obstacles that hold us back.
I am so excited that over 30 women have joined the challenge to wear 30 items for 30 days and learn about their style and their clothes and mindsets in it all. Some of these women are just posting pictures in our message group, some are sharing on Instagram. Catch my Instagram stories to see my epic Mid-30s Canadian Mom Outfit Selfies (almost always featuring a basket of laundry in the background).
Today we will focus on PART TWO of the You CAN Simplify Your Life series with the 10 Reasons Why Your Life is Not Simpler
Many of us want to have a simpler life, but we don’t. What hurdles are we up against that make this change hard?
REMEMBER, whatever is sticking out for you as a possible reason, that you aren’t doing anything ‘wrong’. You are just doing what you have always done and that is your brain’s goal: Efficiency! Think what you’ve always thought, do what you’ve always done, live on auto-pilot and conserve energy.
10 Reasons Why Your Life is Not Simpler
1. We are buying into the glorification of “busy”
We live in a culture of busy that tells us (moms!) that if you aren’t busy you are “lazy.” I think it all comes down to our motives for “being busy.” I love to turn to a tool like the Enneagram for this because the Enneagram is so focused on our inner motives.
2. We don’t know what we want
The day I realized I didn’t want this hand-me-down pre-fabricated template of what a successful life looks like, it felt like my life was a blank canvas. How many of us know what we REALLY want from our lives? (We will talk about this more next part of this series!)
3. We don’t know how to start
If you have thought a lot about simplifying your life, you have probably also met a lot of internal resistance. What reasons are popping up for you about why it’s not the “right time”?
In order to start something you need to feel willing, ready and able.
4. We don’t know how to maintain it
I am the first one to advocate for making list and plans, but maintaining ANYTHING also needs motivation and strategy to maintain. (We will dig into this more in the final part of this series.)
5. We aren’t showing up well
Our life will never ever feel simple or be simple until we can show up well for it: with feelings that are proactive, positive, and present. In all my experience as an adult woman, wife, life coach, friend, and mom I feel that everything comes down to this one thing: how we show up. (I will talk about this more in Part Three.)
6. We are making a statement
If we say we want to make a change, but we almost live in a way that is the opposite we are probably making a statement to our own inner beliefs or to the expectations of others.
7. We don’t think our resources are important or precious
We look at all our resources through a lens of how “renewable” or “precious” they are to us. Every resource is yours to be a good steward of, which resource feels most neglected?
8. We can’t say no to others
Things feel noble when we are someone who “puts others first,” but all this serving can still be a form of striving for security and acceptance.
9. We can’t say no to ourselves
I’m not talking about “putting ourselves first.” I am talking about having self-control and showing up for ourselves to actually follow through on the actions we know we want—the ones that give us life instead of distracting us from life.
10. We don’t see that we DO have control
When we become aware that we actually DO have control, we also become aware that nobody else will ever do this for us. It is our responsibility, our right and our privilege to take control of our life.
By the way, I go more in-depth on these 10 reasons your life is not simple in the blog post version of this episode.
I really took a long time to create the worksheets for this part. These worksheets will go through each of the reasons above, outline some indicators it might apply to you and provide you with a task or step to unpack it further.
- What Simple Living Really Comes Down To (blog post)
- What Simple Living Comes Down To (podcast episode 30)
- 10 Reasons Your Life is Not Simpler
- I Stopped Calling Myself a Lazy Mom
- Enneagram 101 (what is it and what are the nine types)
- What is the Life You Want?
- 10 reasons your life is not simpler
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