It’s been a year since everything changed. A year since I started decluttering our home.
These books rustled me up, made me uncomfortable, motivated me to make some big changes. They were marked with an obvious decluttering of the house, but the results have crept into all other aspects of my life.
I have spent the past year getting rid of the ‘excess’ in our house. Nothing has been left untouched. I have rummaged through every room, drawer and cupboard in my home. I have filled the basement with bags and boxes of ‘stuff’ to be moved out and watched truckloads and truckloads of my possessions be carried off to new homes, thrift and garbage.
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Most of us can agree that we have too much stuff. Most of us will get fed up and try to declutter our homes. We turn to decluttering because it sounds like it will clear up our space, make our home cleaner and more organized.
So it surprised me, and not at the same time, that as I decluttered I would have to ‘confront my junk’. I had to acknowledge that I was in an excess and that it felt like a burden. I had to talk myself into letting go of things. I had to wrestle the desires to buy more. All this doesn’t come without its own soul-searching, ugly crying and feeling a bit lost and icky.
These are some of the things that I have learned/relearned/realized during my past year of decluttering my home. . . .
1. The line between ‘enough’ and ‘excess’ is easily crossed
I don’t miss anything I’ve gotten rid of. Clearly, I didn’t ‘need’ it.
So, why? Why did I just keep accumulating? Since leaving for college I’ve spent my adult life purchasing and storing, purchasing and storing. To a point that I’ve felt like my home had become a glorified storage unit.
At what point can I say ‘enough’? Logic tells us to accumulate only what we have room, money and use for….I’ve just spent a decade and a half doing the opposite. Illogical.
2. I’ve wasted so much money
I think as North Americans we have a certain privilege that we can toss dollars (whether we have them or not) around ‘for fun’. We buy cheap crap that doesn’t work or last, or we decide we don’t like it. Then we brush it off because it was cheap and we just toss it.
We live in a culture of excess and we are so used to accumulating every time that we go out. As I saw truckloads of ‘stuff’ leave my house it was like watching loads of money drive away. I spent money on ALL of that stuff – for whatever reason I justified at the time. I was so disappointed in the money I had wasted on stuff.
3. I’ve been filling space for the sake of filling space
In decluttering all the items of my early 20s it is clear that I was desperate to ‘adult’ without taking the time to get to know myself as one.
Over the years I’ve accumulated two of everything, one for ‘2013 Shawna’ and one for ‘2001 Shawna’ – who didn’t have a clue about herself and just bought all the token adult items without really loving them.
What’s that saying…’we spend money we don’t have, to buy things we don’t need, to impress people we don’t like’. At least some of that was true for the young adult version of myself. I would buy wall art, dishes, lamps, clothes, whatever. There wasn’t thought and attention put into the things I spent money on, I didn’t see it as an investment in creating a home rather just a quick way to fill the space. I just bought what I saw in the store because I felt the need to have an ‘adult’ living space.
4. I’ve made so much waste
As I’ve watched truckloads leave my house, all I could think was that I was a shitty steward of the items I chose to take into my care. All of the little plastic things, electronics, clothes, accessories, and discount housewares were things I bought and took ownership of. As I’ve decluttered I have tried to take the time to find homes for things, but the rest goes to thrift….and if they can’t sell it it’s into the landfill.
How long is my cheap wall art going to take to disintegrate? (And disintegration ain’t’ pretty right!?) And what about the dozen pieces of plastic toys my kids just brought in the door? We have luxuries like tossing our items without a single thought or indication about what happens to it past our street curb. What does happen to it?
The sad this is I KNOW what happens, and maybe this is why it bothers me so much. I have a degree in Environmental Health but I was being blind to my little part in the big picture of what is happening in our world. We can all take little baby steps that help us move more towards zero waste and I realized I wanted to start by not buying crap stuff that would be discarded in the next months or year.
5. This is all just a distraction
Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t lived a luxurious or indulgent lifestyle (unless you count my need for brand name cheese and two drawers full of makeup and hair products) but I see now that this ‘lifestyle of consumption’ has been a distraction.
The modern definition of ‘success’ is coated in a layer of consumerism and I believe we are the generation that can help shed that as we begin to live our lives based on our personal values rather than based on a culture definition of success.
As I’ve gotten rid of the excess stuff in my home there has been a void. Not only in my living space, but in my time and in my thoughts.
I see that those things I held on to for security, identity, value, or whatever reason were distracting me from living a purposeful life. Getting rid of the excess stuff caused me to ask, what do I love and value the most? I feel like I get to live a more genuine and intentional life with this mindset of saying no to the excess.
6. Life is still messy
Our house is still messy (if you have seen my Instagram stories “we are minimalists, but we also live here“). There are piles of craft supplies, books, legos, tools out. But these are things we chose to keep because we value them, so I am unapologetic.
Minimalism isn’t about a spotless home. I believe that minimalism is about clearing out the clutter and excess so you can live life in your space. Life still happens and life gets messy.
7. It is a mindset, not an end goal
I would love to say I’m done decluttering, but I see that it will be ongoing. There is a constant rotation of clothes, toys and furniture when you have three small kids. I need to constantly be decluttering the space and be protective of what I bring into the home.
8. It leads to more
In my case, decluttering my home lead to me reassessing my whole life. I realized I was painfully complacent in how I handled my stuff, my relationships, my health, my dreams.
Minimalism became the action that brought me face to face with my decisions, my clutter and the way I just let life pass me by. It has spurred me to think about what gives me passion and purpose, and really try to live LIFE ON PURPOSE. This has even led to me becoming a Life Coach and helping other moms get ‘unstuck’ in feeling restless, overwhelmed and angry. Which then led me to become trained as a Counsellor and continue the role of helping people get UNSTUCK.
Thank you for coming on this journey with me and my family. Make sure to check out the Simple on Purpose PODCAST! to stay in touch and encouraged on your own journey!
Love Shawna, your Nerdy Girlfriend + Counsellor/Coach who took six months to give up her IPSY makeup bag subscription #noregrets#allthemakeup
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Simplifying Your Home (landing page for all posts about decluttering)